Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Don't Quote Me On That


Inspired by that mom on youtube.com who made up lyrics to the William Tell Overture, I've been keeping track of what words come out of MY mouth to my kids. It ain't pretty.

That’s not a song, quit playing it on the piano! ......... Use your legs and walk down the stairs to talk to me! ........... Anything left on the stairs by bedtime goes in the garbage ............. Get those frosted mini wheats off of the couch ............. Spit out that wad of gum (an entire pack) before you choke to death ....... Life will stink next week while you’re gone (to Paul) ......... I’m going potty by myself. Get out ........... Why is an entire box of Krispy Kreme donuts in your bed? ........... Get out of the chocolate chips ............ What’s all this powder on your bed? Pop rocks? ........... Buckle the body ............ If you can’t find any soap to wash your body just use the bubbles in the water left from the shampoo ............ You don’t want the vinaigrette here at Brick Oven, Ilene, it’s no good. (To the server) No offense ....... Quit eating just the raisins out of the Raisin Bran .......... Why did you beat a 1,000 scratches into the piano bench with a naked Barbie?...... If you keep talking (at night) I’m taking away the radio .......... You’re not wearing the bunny costume to the Post Office.

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

OK, I KNOW you learned a few of those from our parents. Parenthood has its own sick cycles, I think. You are perpetuating some. I love it. I really do. As long as you don't start threatening to turn the car around, in which case I will disown you.

Anonymous said...

Oh, that comment was from me, CARE. I hate this anonymous publisher crap. Stupid website, I want credit for my sarcastic defications!!!!

Ilene said...

Oh, I need to do this too. My favorite was the comment about the vinagarette and the subsequent "no offense." Love it.

cyn the win said...

Carolyn,

How many times did Dad actually turn around the car? I can honestly only remember one. We stopped in Diamond Bar to get gas on our way to Disneyland and Dad, sure enough, turned around the car to head home, all 5 miles. We cried and cried and he eventually headed back to Disneyland. Hilarious. Good for Dad. I have pulled over and told the kids to get out though. Nobody tells me 'you're not mommy' and gets to ride in my red van.

Winnie said...

Just think of all the many compliments you could have received on the bunny costume....hee, hee....I know when I took Jackson to the bookstore holding a sword and hook that many compliments were paid....although I don't think Jackson appreciated the attention!

mom2qtboys said...

too funny cynthia-I love the potty thing-I've said that myself a few times- and who did the Krispy Kremes belong to? Oh and if you liked the William Tell overture you might like this http://pancakesandpinesol.blogspot.com/2007/09/cute.html
(I don't know how to get the link to show up in comments)

cyn the win said...

Winnie--Hallie was naked under the see through bunny costume and it was only 45 degrees that day!

Nicole--of course it was Hallie with the stupid box of donuts on her bed. Sugar, sugar, is all she wants! Ever!

Lauriej said...

Cyn- you've got to check out the drama on my blog:-) start with the first comment under my laundry sign post

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