I like to download free sewing patterns on the internet because I am a cheapskate. I definitely shy away from the more crafty projects (lavender eye masks and kitty tunnels) and focus in on useful sewing projects (headbands and aprons.) But tonight I ran across a crafty sewing pattern that I just had to share with you all. Get ready to wipe away tears of laughter. (I swear I am making one for my sister Carolyn--the road rage doll, different poem than below. Umm-humm. )
When you want to kick the desk
or throw the phone and shout.
Here's a little dammit doll you cannot do without.
Just grasp it firmly by the legs,
and find a place to slam it.
And as you whack it's stuffing out, yell,
"dammit, dammit, dammit!"
It's worth a try! They have all kinds of poems on the website.
9 comments:
OK, that is hilarious. Make them out of left over Amy Beutler scraps so they look good on the desk, dash, whatever.
Maybe that could be a YW sewing project :-)
Okay, let me try to jump again thru these hoops to post a silly comment:
If you want to give Carolyn a doll, make her a dozen or so. Now she has to drive everyday all the way to Wildomar from Chino instead of to Pomona. (If I had to do that I would just ask for a gun and one single bullet)
Also, she'll be needing a car-vac to clean up the stuffing from her front seats and dashboard.
Pops
no dad, I'd need a dozen so's I could roll down the window and throw it at the other cars shouting "Die! Die! Die!"
Carolyn
Ahhh, poor Care! You are the brunt of everyone's jokes.
I think we need to get dad a "damnit dear" doll!
Love,
Patty
Yes! Patty, we should make dad a 'dammit dear' doll. Who's going to write the poem? Merry Christmas dad!
As I recall, Carolyn is quite talented when it comes to writing poems. Are you in on this, Care? You write dad his "damnit dear" doll poem, and Cyn and I will actually construct the "damn" doll.
We will give the poor thing crossed-eyes, and everything. Then, maybe dad will think twice before sending the poor thing across the room.................
And, um, Care? I hate to break the news to you, dahling. But, your dozen road rage dolls would only last you about 5 minutes. If your commute is about an hour long, you would need more than 150 0f them to last your commute.
How 'bout we construct one for you with a long piece of elastic attached to it with reinforced seams. That way, you can throw the doll, and it will come back to you in once piece.
That's a really good idea about the elastic snap-back! Let's do it. I cursed at 5 cars today already, so you can clearly see how much use that doll would get. -carebear
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