I like to download free sewing patterns on the internet because I am a cheapskate. I definitely shy away from the more crafty projects (lavender eye masks and kitty tunnels) and focus in on useful sewing projects (headbands and aprons.) But tonight I ran across a crafty sewing pattern that I just had to share with you all. Get ready to wipe away tears of laughter. (I swear I am making one for my sister Carolyn--the road rage doll, different poem than below. Umm-humm. )
When you want to kick the desk
or throw the phone and shout.
Here's a little dammit doll you cannot do without.
Just grasp it firmly by the legs,
and find a place to slam it.
And as you whack it's stuffing out, yell,
"dammit, dammit, dammit!"
It's worth a try! They have all kinds of poems on the website.
OK, that is hilarious. Make them out of left over Amy Beutler scraps so they look good on the desk, dash, whatever.
ReplyDeleteMaybe that could be a YW sewing project :-)
Okay, let me try to jump again thru these hoops to post a silly comment:
ReplyDeleteIf you want to give Carolyn a doll, make her a dozen or so. Now she has to drive everyday all the way to Wildomar from Chino instead of to Pomona. (If I had to do that I would just ask for a gun and one single bullet)
Also, she'll be needing a car-vac to clean up the stuffing from her front seats and dashboard.
Pops
no dad, I'd need a dozen so's I could roll down the window and throw it at the other cars shouting "Die! Die! Die!"
ReplyDeleteCarolyn
Ahhh, poor Care! You are the brunt of everyone's jokes.
ReplyDeleteI think we need to get dad a "damnit dear" doll!
Love,
Patty
Yes! Patty, we should make dad a 'dammit dear' doll. Who's going to write the poem? Merry Christmas dad!
ReplyDeleteAs I recall, Carolyn is quite talented when it comes to writing poems. Are you in on this, Care? You write dad his "damnit dear" doll poem, and Cyn and I will actually construct the "damn" doll.
ReplyDeleteWe will give the poor thing crossed-eyes, and everything. Then, maybe dad will think twice before sending the poor thing across the room.................
ReplyDeleteAnd, um, Care? I hate to break the news to you, dahling. But, your dozen road rage dolls would only last you about 5 minutes. If your commute is about an hour long, you would need more than 150 0f them to last your commute.
ReplyDeleteHow 'bout we construct one for you with a long piece of elastic attached to it with reinforced seams. That way, you can throw the doll, and it will come back to you in once piece.
That's a really good idea about the elastic snap-back! Let's do it. I cursed at 5 cars today already, so you can clearly see how much use that doll would get. -carebear
ReplyDelete